Written by Esther Adelman, Temple Hesed, Scranton, PA

Once upon a time, Abe Adelman, a nice 31-year-old Jewish boy from Chicago, and a Ukrainian girl from Blakely fell in love; they were secretly married on September 4, 1939.  Olga Mozurkewich, at 21, still lived with her family, but when her mother was told that the youngest of her 12 living children was seen with a dirty Jew, she was kicked out of the only home that she had ever known. That was the beginning of a 60-year journey that ended when Olga, then Abe, passed away 6-months apart in 1998.

Religion was not an issue.  The only thing that Abe took away from his Orthodox family was dietary:  no pork or shellfish were allowed.  Olga very occasionally went to church, but we knew nothing about her religion.  We children were raised with the premise that we would choose our own religion when we felt the need.  No holidays of either faith were celebrated.  Even Halloween was considered by Abe to be a Christian event. Santa Claus did come, though, and he brought us presents.

We lived in the Hill Section of Scranton, which was heavily populated by the Jewish Community.   As a result, James Madison School was about 80-90% Jewish.  We were taught by a bevy of older women, all Catholic graduates of Marywood College.  I was uncomfortable in that setting from kindergarten through eighth grade, not fitting in at all.  Even though the student population was predominately Jewish, we were taught every Christmas carol that was ever written, but never one word about Chanukah! 

I did identify with Judaism.  Here’s what pushed me in that direction.  When I was 7 years old, we were finally allowed back into my Ukrainian grandmother’s house.  My father would dutifully take us to a houseful of people that we barely knew, but everyone completely ignored him, and they were not that friendly to us either.  I felt out of place once again. I never forgot that.  On the other hand, my dad’s entire family of 6 siblings and a multitude of aunts, uncles, and cousins still lived in the Chicago area.  We didn’t see them that often, but when anyone came for a visit or the few times that we made the trip there, it was a wonderful warm experience, with lots of hugs and kisses all around.  I finally felt like I belonged!

When I was a sophomore at Central, Sigma Omega Pi, one of the two Jewish sororities there, asked me to pledge, and the rest is history!  I became the president of SOPS, became active at Madison Avenue Temple’s Youth Group, and was extremely involved at the YMHA, which became the JCC during my junior or senior year.

When I became engaged to a Jewish man, even though I was totally immersed in Judaism and identified solely as a Jew, I decided to formally convert, since patrilineal descent was not yet recognized by the Reform Movement.  When my husband-to-be said that I didn’t have to do that for him, I laughed and replied that I wasn’t doing it for him, but for myself and our children. We attended couples’ classes given by Rabbi Milton Richman, who did my conversion at the conclusion.

I then threw myself into temple life, becoming Sisterhood President at the ripe old age of 27.  The more involved I got, the less my husband, raised in Temple Israel, was interested.  At one point, he couldn’t hide his disappointment when I totally squashed his request for a Christmas tree.

Now let’s get back to my family.  Originally, I was the eldest in a group of three children born to Abe and Olga Adelman.  After a twelve-year gap, three more siblings arrived.  When they became school-age, I begged my parents to join Temple Hesed and send the younger group to school there.  I explained how lost I had been because of not having a religion. Happily, they realized that it was the right thing to do.

Because I have always been a curious student who loves learning, I have eagerly attended every adult ed class offered by our Rabbis; I also studied on my own.  I had to make up for my total lack of Jewish education while growing up.  Now I feel as though I can hold my own in any conversation about Judaism, and if I (rarely) can’t answer a question posed to me by a non-Jew, I have all the material in my home library to come back to them with an answer.

I’ve told my story to explain why my Judaism is such an important part of my life. I’ve never hidden my Jewishness, and I never will!  It is more than a religion.  It is a people; it is a culture; it is a family, albeit one which has the same issues as one’s personal family.  I am proud to be a member of that family!